seeing white

Poetry | February 25, 2010

the blizzard

its in your eyes
circling
in the sleeplessness
dropping further
into your core

you told me once
how it follows you
how you can't separate
or force it away
that voice at the top of the stairs
growling and cursing
waiting to push you down

it rolled you out flat

i watched you climb over top of me
fierce eyes for
a threat so real
i was paralyzed in the ice of its breath

and still it taunts
from your shadow
tapping you back
begging
for your slightest attention
for your only satisfaction

you are your only battle

that demon in the closet
the dragon, the ghost, the darkness
that hides it all
no gun, no blade, no bow and arrows
will slay the cost of your slipping heart

somewhere in there
you are blood red and brave
your fire burns from the inside out
and you are the only one with the torch

captured in your long frame
your bones rattle
from all the noise inside
your nightly tirades
land in my sleeping ears
and there is nothing to do
except stay

i'm not running
but i won't stand still

day three

it's all in the air
in the atmosphere we breathe
such simple notions of being human
pushing us through
to the other side of white

where the noise can disrupt even the tightest connection
fray its end
leaving only sparks of evidence
that we exist

i won't go down like that
not in this storm

i'm used to waiting
and well practiced in containing myself

flakes turn to drops
and your vision is clearing

i can see you again
see straight through to the pulse in your veins
and you sweat and tear and fuck the night
with your scarred fists

i know you'll never be alone
and i'll take you both
i'll take you both down
through the storm inside us
and when the bottom comes
there's nothing left to do but rise